An update

Name: Ben.

Hometown: Sydney, New South Wales, Australia.

Current Location: Boston, Massachusetts, USA.

Work: My project has yielded some promising results, so that's a positive. I don't find my project particularly interesting or beneficial for me career-wise, so that's a negative. Additionally, my current research isn't really that congruent with my PhD training, and it's not what I want to research in the future, score more negatives. I came to Boston to gain experience such that I could return to Sydney and consider starting my own lab. My current position isn't facilitating this ambition so I'm scoping alternate labs, with the aim of starting afresh early next year. So this work transition is totally stressing me out. Work score = 4/10

Family: My family is dysfunctional to say the least. Brother is still recovering from his psychosis and remains out of the workforce. Dad continues being a selfish asshole that makes me ashamed to be his son. Mum is overworked and always stressed due to Brother's illness and Dad's antics. Since I am the only family member she can really speak to, she misses me significantly. I'm constantly battling the feeling of guilt over leaving her (and Brother) to pursue a life on the other side of the world. Still, things on the family front aren't as volatile as they have been previously. Family score = 5/10.

Friends: Bing and Lulu continue to be my extremely compassionate guides here in Boston, I owe them a lot. They're like caring older siblings, who are wiser, reassuring and less erratic than me. I continue to talk with them extensively about my work dilemmas and Boston life in general. My two very close friends in the lab, Maestro and Ariel have been extremely considerate and are two really positive people who are fun to hang out with. I'll blog about our time together in future posts. Bay-buddy is constantly supportive and has helped me out immensely, but since he is no longer in the lab we only catch up weekly or so. Of course there's Ex-flatmate and my other long-time mates, GK, Entrepreneur, The Scotsman, Ace & Surfermate, providing essential support +61. Friends score = 9/10.

Love: My status is single. Very, very single. Sigh. I didn't blog about it, but there was an Irish guy, Sean, who I am no longer seeing, but it's OK as it never seemed to be a serious long-term relationship from the beginning. There just wasn't that 'something' between us, but we had some great times, he was charming and damn his accent was adorable (of course he said the same about my Aussie speech). I haven't been particularly proactive in finding a boyfriend recently and this is something I'm seeking to improve on in the immediate future. Love score = 3/10.

Mental health: Between my family and career, it's been a particularly uncertain and worrisome period of my life. Boston still continues to show me novel experiences that makes me feel as if I'm moving forward in my life, perhaps not always in an anticipated direction or as smoothly as expected, but still 'proceeding' nonetheless. There have been times when I've been on the precipice of slipping into depression again, but thankfully this has been avoided. A few weeks of being generally melancholic is the worst I've felt. Mental health score = 6/10.

Physical health: The gym is one of my favourite places. Maestro and I go regularly. We not only train together and motivate each other, but the gym is our place to discuss the lab and everything else in our lives. It's one of our sanctuaries away from work where we can work-out and goof around. I also feel that the exercise-induced endorphins are a key to me avoiding depression. With winter here, running outside is no longer an option, so the gym has become crucial to my mental and physical well-being. I'm definitely as fit as I've ever been, although an underwear-model-worthy six-pack still eludes me, so minus one point. Physical health score = 8/10.

Overall: It's been an emotional, life-changing year, and compared to some other awful years, 2007 ranks as a good one. My Boston life could obviously have been better work-wise (and relationship wise), but in the end this is irrelevant as it could have been much worse. It's difficult to not regret or overanalyse certain decisions I've made in, and leading up to, Boston life, but I'm trying to remain pragmatic and positive about my current situation.

With the close of another year, it's natural to take stock of our lives and resolve to improve on the less optimal parts. I'm looking forward to the challenges of next year. It's not going to be any easier that's for sure, but that as they say, is life. There's no guarantee that I'll rant any less, but I'll try to rave a bit more. My Boston adventure is just getting interesting, I feel that it's "maturing". Should be an intriguing next couple of months.

Blogging was initially designed to keep my mates up to date with my activities here, and it has also been cathartic and immensely enjoyable, I anticipate blogging through next year.

Life is always a struggle, and as one individual amongst the 6,639,361,044 current inhabitants on this world, I try to remind myself that I'm very fortunate to be in my current position. For those of us living relatively privileged lives (I'd imagine the majority reading this blog fits into this category), it's always refreshing to look outside of our daily microcosm and gain a wider perspective on the grander scheme of humanity. Considering I'm not fighting for survival in a war-torn country or suffering from a debilitating illness, it's clear that having an ideal job or being in a loving relationship, really are luxuries in life.

Of course we all know these realities, but it's not often that we actually remember them.

Having the opportunity to live abroad in a great city, getting a PhD, having a Macbook Pro to play with, hanging out with some amazing friends and having a loving (albeit messed up) family are luxuries in my life. I shouldn't complain.

Well that's my current status and the last post until I return to Boston from my European holiday (I fly out in a few hours and still have to pack, shit!). To my mates, enjoy the Sydney summer, don't go too crazy over NYE (I'm looking at you Scotsman), and if there's anything I've been reminded of from living in Boston, it's to be a little more bold and dip outside your comfort zone from time to time, who knows what you'll gain. Miss you guys immeasurably. To everyone reading this, may the New Year find you safe and well. My overall score remains = +61.